With So Many Friends, Why Are People Lonely?

How could a person with over 1,000 “friends” of Facebook ever be lonely?  I mean with all those “friends,” surely one’s life would be full and productive, right? Increasingly, the answer to that question is no and alarmingly, people are actually becoming more isolated than ever.

We used to spend time with friends — quality time in which we created and shared memories together. We laughed, cried, talked and balked but we did it together. Today, that living, in-person relationship is disappearing, replaced by comments, likes, group messages and texts. Where once we engaged socially and talked face-to-face, we now let our words be carried for us across cyberspace, falsely believing that we’re having a relationship with that person. We’re not. Relationships are meant to be dynamic, fulfilling and real. We’re not meant to experience the most important aspects of our life through cyberspace — we’re meant to share them, warts-an-all, with live people in real time and that means being in the moment and fully present.

“We’re becoming unsocial.”

The video “Look Up” by Gary Turk is a poignant reminder of how relationships are supposed to be — how they once were and, with focus, can be once again. Watch this video and ask yourself if your life is more fulfilled and joyful because of social media, or less. To quote Gary: “We’re at our most happy with an experience we share, but is it the same if no one is there?”

“Don’t let yourself by hypnotized by technology. Be in the moment and experience the wonder of direction connections. “ – Gary Turk

Direct, real connections are absolutely vital to our well-being. We should all be striving to once again truly “connect” with people and not let a lifeless group message or text pass itself off for a real relationship.  You may have several hundred Facebook “friends,” but would they drop everything to see you? So go ahead and click “like” when your friend posts pictures of her vacation, but then pick up the phone and call that friend and say “lets have lunch tomorrow…I want to hear all about your vacation!”

Gary Turk sums it up nicely when he says: “I don’t want you to stop using social media or smartphones. It’s about finding a balance. It’s about making sure you are awake, alive and living life in the moment; instead of living your life through a screen.”